If you’re a spouse debating whether to fight for your marriage or to divorce and start improving your lives separately, hypnosis can guide you towards a decision. As I always tell couples in therapy, you need to figure out: What do you want, given all the facts of where you are right now and how that might change should you decide to split? Are you both willing to deal with the mess I don’t know any divorce that wasn’t messy. The thing is, how messy does it get and what kind of mess is it; so again, figure it out: What’s the mess gonna look like and how big is it gonna be?
Personally, I have no bias towards one solution over the other. Most mediators are slightly biased toward maintaining marriage even if the husband and wife are clearly content to get a divorces. I, on the other hand, can totally grasp the sanctity of marriage and the adventure of a post-divorce life.
Even couples with awful chemistry and can’t stand each other possess the power to effect change with action. No couple is paralyzed — they might strangle each other in frustration, but they’re not paralyzed. So, if the two of you are feeling a certain irreconcilable tension in your relationship, if it’s just NOT happening for whatever reason, you need to know that whatever happens is in the palm of your hands. You don’t need me to tell you that.
What you do need from me, however, is assessment that gets to a point. The three of us will be working through emotional, biographical, familial, and economic situation in your marriage; until we understand what the mutual desire is between you and your spouse. That desire might be created as we find it, or it might simply be there waiting to be revealed. Maybe one person is denying a part of himself, maybe one’s sexual needs aren’t being met and they’re mistaking that for lack of love, etc. Whatever it is, there will be a lot of stripping involved. Stripping of obstacles, of defenses, of false assumptions. The list goes on. Are you and your spouse confused on what to do, now that one’s got a foot out the door and the other wants to say “stay” but can’t?
Give me a call and start getting your act together before it’s too late. (212) 599-3195.